Hello, my fellow surface dwellers! The Tourist has gone supernatural today! The question I put before you today lays its basis on the numerous childhood fantasies that I pursued in my dreams, only to wake up and realize that none of it was real! Well, it didn’t stop me from dreaming though…and that explains this crazy, out of the world post that I am writing now! So here it is: Have you ever wanted to be a superhero? I mean, wouldn’t it be cool to be endowed with some really awesome abilities….like shooting webs from the palm of your hand, or blow stuff to pieces with just your angry gaze? How about we take it a step further? Suppose you got this really cool ability that lets you teleport from place to place by just thinking about it? Wouldn’t that be something!
I believe everyone among us would give about everything to live the life of a superhero just for a day. After all, who doesn’t crave the endless adulation and love that is showered upon a superhero? And let’s not forget those impossible death-defying stunts that would put even the best circus acts to shame; or those cool one-liners that you get to dish out while battling the bad guys! Needless to say, the life of a superhero is incomplete without cheerleaders-people who hoot and whistle every time he fells one of the evil doers, doting fans that wouldn’t mind being squished by Godzilla to see their favorite hero in action. Oh wait, how could I ever forget to mention the cherry on the cake! You get to have the most awesome babe in town as your girlfriend! A hero sure needs some time out from his strenuous job of saving the people every time some crazy one-eyed scientist decides to go rogue and tries to blow up the town with his latest invention, doesn’t he!
By the age of 18, I had watched enough Cartoon Network and read too many Spiderman issues to decide that I too, was going to be a superhero someday. Being a careful planner by nature, I decided to gear up for the big day….the day, when the world will watch with bated breath its new savior who would release it from its purgatory. Better be well prepared than be troubled by last-minute hassles! The task required indomitable spirit and commitment that was way beyond what was humanely possible. So, I set about the task ahead with a burning desire in my heart, a drawing book and a pencil in hand. “Mom! I am preparing for my Board exams! Do not disturb me!”.
Now, first things first. What makes a superhero unique? His powers, of course! But, I was a normal kid…..ummm…a little below normal, in fact. I couldn’t intimidate even my little sis with my angry gaze, let alone burn stuff to ashes.....My journey to stardom seemed to be headed for a crash even before it took off! Then, just as all hope seemed lost, I was suddenly blinded by a splendid glimmer of heavenly light, equivalent to a thousand burning suns! All things seemed to make sense all of a sudden. All doubts evaporated into thin air. My mind, dwelling among the throes of despair and solitude till then, suddenly found new meaning-a new path! It wasn’t long before I realized that the ‘heavenly light’ was the flash of the camera my sister was holding in her hands. She just happened to sneak into my room and upon seeing my open-mouthed, absent-minded expression, had the brilliant idea of capturing it on cam! Damn these next-gen kids…their brain works faster than a BMW on full throttle! Sometimes, even now, I have a nagging feeling that my sis is some sort of an alien who wants to take revenge for some reason I can’t fathom! Maybe, in my previous birth, I was an inter-galactic warrior who had chanced upon this planet full of evil aliens and had blasted it off into oblivion with his angry gaze. Cool!! But somehow, one of them had survived….and was now standing in front of me with its stupid cam in hand…ready to put those pics on Facebook and humiliate me in every possible way…
“AAH! FUCUS DUDE, FOCUS! Even if your sis is an alien with a twisted sense of humor, you can’t do anything! Simply because you don’t have any powers right now! The message wasn’t from heaven, so what? Does it matter much that the ‘blinding flash of light, equivalent to a thousand suns’ was from a Nikon Coolpix? It cleared all your doubts, didn’t it? So get on with it! A superhero is above all these issues. Look at the bigger picture, dude….bigger picture”
Bigger picture……the words kept echoing in my mind. And then I realized that everything that I had been looking for all this time was in fact right in front of me! On my study table right next to the wall with the big picture of Priyanka Chopra in a swimsuit, was the bible of all Superherodom…..the Van Helsing for all my peace-sucking doubts….the AL Pacino of all answers…..it was….it was…
Next Part: What was it?
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